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Daily Thought #6 – A Rainy Merry Christmas To The Mullet Man!

Hello Fans, Friends, and Fellow Fanatics,

I haven’t been able to produce more content in the last few days due to a mass of Christmas shopping and things to do around this time of year.

Only two more days!  Hope your Christmas season is panning out to be a great one this year full of holiday fun and surprises.

I sure got a strange one today…

It was a late awakening this morning thanks to the pathetic waste of an alarm clock with a mind of its own–and the dim light from my closed blinds carried a terribly gloomy persona.  Even those wood slats seemed to droop with despair, though what a piece of wood could be solemn about I don’t know.  All through the house there was not a family member in sight and a silence eerily overwhelmed the halls and bare rooms.  This place in which I had awakened was bereft of any signs of life or excitement to foreshadow the coming days’ festivities and traditions.  My dog Kashoo lazed about under the couch and Raja curled herself tightly in the corner of her kennel–and even they were quiet today. Both stared at me as if I were supposed to tell them what to do with their lives.  Little did I know that their expressions were only mimicking my own emotions on the day.  But there was no one to tell me what to do with my life today.  Right…  Gotta be an adult.  (I thought that when I got to this age it would be easier to be responsible and I would have some vast amount of knowledge to be a driving force but….  That’s a lie.  Just like the Cake– Yes, that is a Portal reference.  Though it’s difficult to be an adult, you still gotta push through it.)

I laid still in my bed staring at the bland white ceiling and lingering in the dull moment.  First calm feeling I had been able to enjoy in several months–this would be a blissful morning.  If there were panels on my ceiling I would have counted and named them all, but I settled for daydreaming.  That’s when my phone buzzed.  A cheesy Christmas style alarm downloaded from some holiday iPhone App.  Time to actually move–Ugh.  Can I not?  Just lay here and disappear for one day?  Have you ever felt like that? (Everyday…)  Evidently, I was not in the mood to be awake today.  But, with a mighty grunt I forced myself upright through the exhaustion as we all do when we know we have to be productive on a free day.  What was the source of this tiredness?  Age?  I am not quite half way to fifty.  (Well…  When I put it that way it’s not all that encouraging….  –Let’s try it again..)

I am 6 months shy of being 25..  (Better)

With my “old” brain, I had fortunately miscalculated the dates of my extended family arriving for the festivities that would transpire over the next few days and luckily for me, this gave me one last day to do final Christmas shopping… And I didn’t sleep through their arrival.  Very lucky indeed!

I got into my car.  My mind had apparently spaced on the whole “getting ready for the day” thing and lapsed to this moment.  How long had I been sitting here staring at my steering wheel?  I forget… Was that scratch always there?  Shaking off my disillusioned state, I turned the key and took a deep breath at the cranking roar of my beat up little Nissan Altima.

Suddenly, I was in the parking lot of a McDonalds.  I hate those golden arches.  Hadn’t eaten there in a long time.  Why was I here?  Oh.  That’s right.  No spots at the Starbucks about 100 yards away across the sea of asphalt and grassy medians.  Christmas season’s last minute shoppers–other people like me.

A beautiful maroon Altima caught my attention.  It was a much newer model than mine and clearly mocking me with her glowing shine.  Who gets a wax when it’s raining?  That guy apparently.  Expensive business suit–Briefcase; typical white collar working man–who was stopping at a McDonalds?  Whatever.  Not important.  What was important was the strange vehicle that I was staring at.  The big monster in front of me.  My eyes were still focusing and a thought of how in the world I had driven myself here crossed my mind but I was stilled on those words.  The words on the side of this dump of a machine.

mullet_Machine

“Mullet Construction”….?

What does that mean?  You are the constructor of mullets?  I plugged the word mullet into my dictionary App…  It look forever loading as usual. ————- loading——————–loading———————loading….

The only way that I had heard the word mullet used was to define the awkward mess of a haircut.  Which makes no sense being on this work vehicle.  How do you construct mullets?  Are you a hair stylist?  Specializing in turning people into “Joe Dirt” wannabes?  (Dumb film by the way)  I did a little more research.  Were there other translations of the word?…..

——-Ah!  Finally it finished loading!

MULLET; Dictionary Definitions.

1. Any of several marine or freshwater, usually gray, fishes of the family Mugilidae, having a nearly cylindrical body.  (You construct Cylindrical Fish?  You are not God sir.  Only He can do that.  Maybe a clever, but really lame scientist to be wasting your time building strangely shaped fish.)
2. A Goatfish. (Actually a pretty cool fish!)
goatfish
3. A sucker, especially of the genus Moxostoma.  (Another fish…  Still a lame scientist building fish instead of studying ways to cure cancer.)
Origin:
1400–50; late Middle English mulet  < Middle French  < Latin mullus  red mullet
4. a starlike charge having five points unless a greater number is specified, used especially as the cadency mark of a third son.  (Okay…  Cuz that makes more sense then being a fish constructor)
So, after reviewing all of the fact,s in my head of course, I came to the brilliant and blatantly obvious conjecture that the sign on this beastly car had to be talking about the hair style.  Therefore this person, who resembled an awkward conglomeration of redneck and hippie characteristics as he approached the vehicle, must have been none other than—The Mullet Man!  (So that is where people go to get that awful haircut!)
Now…  Anyone up for some Christmas shopping?
Hope you enjoyed this amusing little tale of my morning and a MERRY CHRISTMAS to you all!
Gearbendr Signing Out

2. A goatfish.

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